Wonderful News, I have lost 20 pounds. I keep standing on the scale because I just don't believe it. I knew I had been striving for that goal but I HONESTLY don't think that I have been giving it my 100% best effort. I could always do better...but couldn't we all?!?! Anyway YAY!!!
Over the last couple of days I have been reminising about my life and thinking of all the times I have tried to lose weight; trying to remember at what point I really started gaining weight and what growing up being overweight meant for me.
As far back as I can really remember I have been overweight. But I guess I really noticed gaining weight at least twice in my life. The first time being after my oldest sister and I were in a car accident, I know I was only 5 at the time but it was a very stressful year for our entire family; and we tend to be emotional eaters meaning we eat our emotions (if we are happy we eat, if we are bored we eat etc etc etc.) The second time I remember starting to gain more weight was in Junior High. I would have to say my 7th and 8th grade years were the worst for me. I know people tell me to forget about the negative things that have been said and remember the positive; but it wasn't always things that were said by my peers it was their actions. One thing I never shared with anyone is how bullied I was in 8th grade because of my weight. I had one classmate who was brutal, she use to poke my stomach and make pilsburry dough boy jokes and would get others in on the joke. One other time that I especially remember is her bringing one of those rubber gloves (the kind you find in a hospital) to school and filling it with milk. She proceded to attach it to my bookbag while I wasn't looking and then had several people "mooing." I luckily had a few wonderful teachers who got me through those years.
I believe it is instences like these that made me hate talking about my weight for so long. Everytime someone brought up anything that had to do with weight or my eating habbits I would get emotional. I have overcome that thankfully, am have found a way to talk about my weight that I am comfortable with. It isn't always easy, and sometimes I do begin to feel self concious about myself. But it is these times that I have to remember that despite my size I am still beautiful. I am not writing this to get people to feel sorry for me, I am just wanting to share my experiences in weight loss whether they be good or bad. My main reason for wanting to lose weight and eat better is just to be healthier; I want to be an example to people and be around for a long time to harass my family and friends *insert evil laugh here!* Until next time...Happy Eating!
Friday, August 19, 2011
Thursday, August 4, 2011
The Snickers are Snickering at Me!
"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.”
~ Jimmy Dean
I think this quote suits me at least as far as my goal is pertained. Sometimes I wonder if I was just destined to be fat! I was talking to some friends recently about my goal and we got on the topic of for my height what I am "suppose" to weigh. I looked online and for a 4'11 person I am suppose to weigh between 95 and 122 pounds. Let's be realistic here....that's NEVER going to happen. I wasn't meant to weigh 120lbs, and I am a little ashamed of this but I am ashamed of that. I realize that if I did get down to that weight, I would honestly look sick. It's not in my genetics to be that thin....too much German heritage...I don't come from a line of "thin" people.
So here is my ultimate goal, I wish to be at least 180. I think this is a decent goal and one that I could reach and stick with. It is also a weight in which I think I would look decent. As of right now, that goal seems so far away!!!
The exercising is going good, I have managed at the very least to work out 3 times a week for 20 minutes. Somedays I do more, but nothing less; my problem is with the eating better/less. I just can't seem to stay away from the problem foods that I LOVE and tend to over eat them. They wouldn't be so bad if I could eat them in moderation but that is my problem area that I am trying to find a way to work on. Also my water jug I bought at the dollar store broke on Saturday, so I need to go find a new one, I have resulted to drinking a lot of soda again. BLAH! It is a process, but I am trying, but sometimes it is just never enough.
Until next time, Happy Eating!
~ Jimmy Dean
I think this quote suits me at least as far as my goal is pertained. Sometimes I wonder if I was just destined to be fat! I was talking to some friends recently about my goal and we got on the topic of for my height what I am "suppose" to weigh. I looked online and for a 4'11 person I am suppose to weigh between 95 and 122 pounds. Let's be realistic here....that's NEVER going to happen. I wasn't meant to weigh 120lbs, and I am a little ashamed of this but I am ashamed of that. I realize that if I did get down to that weight, I would honestly look sick. It's not in my genetics to be that thin....too much German heritage...I don't come from a line of "thin" people.
So here is my ultimate goal, I wish to be at least 180. I think this is a decent goal and one that I could reach and stick with. It is also a weight in which I think I would look decent. As of right now, that goal seems so far away!!!
The exercising is going good, I have managed at the very least to work out 3 times a week for 20 minutes. Somedays I do more, but nothing less; my problem is with the eating better/less. I just can't seem to stay away from the problem foods that I LOVE and tend to over eat them. They wouldn't be so bad if I could eat them in moderation but that is my problem area that I am trying to find a way to work on. Also my water jug I bought at the dollar store broke on Saturday, so I need to go find a new one, I have resulted to drinking a lot of soda again. BLAH! It is a process, but I am trying, but sometimes it is just never enough.
Until next time, Happy Eating!
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